I just don’t like oatmeal and I’m not going to eat it.
There, that was liberating!
Here’s the scoop: I have had a particular oatmeal recipe for years. Every year, around this time, it starts to get cold and I desire something warm for breakfast. And every year I make this oatmeal, with substitutions here and there to find the magic bullet of flavor combinations.
And every year I hate it.
Why the drama? Why the pomp and circumstance surrounding my liberating declaration? Quite simply, because I’m a dietitian and I am supposed to like oatmeal. It’s a whole grain, it has soluble fiber to help lower cholesterol, it will stick to my ribs, it’s a “superfood.” I’m sorry, I’ve tried to make it with butter, cinnamon, brown sugar, dark brown sugar, vanilla almond milk, regular almond milk, and about a 1:1 ratio of maple syrup droplets to single oat particles. It might be a super-food, but I think it’s super-gross.
So today, I made my final batch. Quelle surprise, I disliked it. So I did the unthinkable: I threw it away. I never ever throw food away– I will find a use for anything– but it was more dramatic that way. Closely on the heels of the actual oatmeal was the recipe. So long, farewell, au revoir.
I might as well continue down the path of heresy and divulge another non-dietitian-y habit of mine, just for the record: I can’t stand plain vegetables. They must have dressing if they’re raw or butter if they’re cooked.
To cancel out the negative food energy the oatmeal bestowed upon my kitchen, I had to make something fabulous. Something that screams “I am not sticky, gloppy, flavorless glue.” Something that is more “Hawaii 5-0” than “700 Club.” Those somethings were Banana Espresso Chocolate Chip Muffins.
These are easily the best muffins I have ever made or even tasted. To fully illustrate their level of fabulosity and to make the Booze Hound proud, I will relate them to the world of sports. If there were a fantasy food draft, these would be my #1 pick in the muffin draft. They are the Adrian Peterson of muffins.
Surely, the high butter content of these babies (the muffins, not Peterson) contributes to their #1 status, but it was the combination of flavors that won me over. I’m not a coffee drinker, but rather than the espresso playing a star role, it enhances the flavor of the chocolate and banana so that they’re more mocha-like than anything. And they came together in about 15 minutes, which also included time spent shooing the DH off the counter. What can I say? She has good taste!
I want to give a shout-out to Christina at Sweet Pea’s Kitchen
, who shared this recipe first (and has much lovelier pictures :). She has a fabulous blog, check it out!! Lots of #1 fantasy draft picks!
Banana Espresso Chocolate Chip Muffins
Yield: 12 muffins
1 1/2 c mashed ripe banana (about 3 bananas)
1/2 c sugar
1/4 c light brown sugar, packed
1/2 c (1 stick) melted butter
1/4 c milk
1 large egg
1 1/2 c all purpose flour
1 tsp espresso powder (*I used 1 tsp of the instant Starbucks VIA coffee)
1 1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 c (6 oz) semisweet chocolate chips
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray muffin tin with non-stick cooking spray.
In a medium bowl, stir together the banana, sugars, butter, milk and egg. Set aside.
In another medium bowl, whisk together the flour, espresso/coffee powder, baking soda and salt. Make a well in the middle of the dry ingredients. Pour the wet ingredients into the well and stir until just combined. Fold in the chocolate chips.
Fill each muffin tin cup nearly to the top. Bake for 20-25 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center of the muffin comes out clean. Cool muffins in the tin for 15 minutes, then remove from tin and allow to cool fully on a cooling rack. Devour.